


Witch's Heart chat fic that you didn't ask for but deserved (or maybe not)

by NekomuraTsukiyo



Category: Witch's Heart (Video Game)
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-04
Updated: 2019-06-26
Packaged: 2019-11-09 06:36:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17996795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NekomuraTsukiyo/pseuds/NekomuraTsukiyo
Summary: This is shorter than I intended to but I am using a phone and it's hard to type soAlso, since this is an au where everyone is alive (kind of - the demons are not alive), there's no witch's heart, but ashe is still a nosy guy.





	1. Chapter 1

_**Claire** added  **Ashe** ,  **Wilardo** ,  **Sirius** ,  **Noel** ,  **Zizel** ,  **Charlotte** ,  **Lime** and  **Rouge** into a chatroom_

**Noel:** what is this?

 **Claire:** it's a chatroom! I bet it'd be fun if we can chat altogether AND with demons!

 **Rouge:** Huh? Why would I want to chat with humans and haters? I'm leaving.

 **Sirius:** Precisely. I am not interested in chatting with you uncultured people and suspicious beings who kept on creeping in Lady Dorothy's mansion.

 **Ashe:** Ehhhhhh? I think it's a great idea!

 **Zizel:** Actually, Rouge, I heard that you can change everyone's nickname whatever you like

 **Lime:** Oooh! Sounds interesting!

 **Charlotte:** Hmm? Let me try

 **_Charlotte_  ** _changed their username into **Charlie**_

 **Rouge:** Why didn't you tell me earlier? 

 **Zizel:** You never asked...

_**Rouge** changed  **Claire** 's username into  **Pighead**_

_**Wilardo** changed  **Ashe** 's username into  **Trashe**_

**Pighead:** Why do you have to pick on me???

 **Trashe:** Yeah!!! Why, Wilardo?

 **Rouge:** Do I need a specific reason? You should be grateful that I actually bother to change your username.

 **Wilardo:** To be fair, no one likes you, Ashe.

 **Pighead:** But Ashe is nice!

 **Sirius:** Mind you, this intruder picks locks and asks far too many unnecessary questions. Definitely not a likeable personality.

 **Noel:** Well, honestly, the only likeable persons are Sirius and Claire...

 **Charlie:** Oh, someone's favourism is showing

 **Sirius:** That talking gorilla??? What???

 **Lime:** Why do you like this overly prideful lavender anyway? He resists too strongly! 

 **Rouge:** Says the one who has self-harming fetish.

 **Sirius:** Did you just call me "lavender"?

 **Wilardo:** It kind of suits you.

 **Pighead:** You're right!

 **_Pighead_ ** _changes **Sirius** 's username into  **Lavender**_

 **Lavender:** I didn't sign up for this. Lady Dorothy help me.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is shorter than I intended to but I am using a phone and it's hard to type so
> 
> Also, since this is an au where everyone is alive (kind of - the demons are not alive), there's no witch's heart, but ashe is still a nosy guy.

**Charlie:** It bothers me that only a few of us are using usernames so

 **_Charlie_ ** _changed **Wilardo** 's username into  **Edgelord**_

_**Charlie** changed  **Noel** 's username into  **Claire#1supporter**_

_**Charlie** changed  **Zizel** 's username into  **HitOrMiss**_

**_Charlie_ ** _changed **Lime** 's username into  **Bittersweet**_

 **_Charlie_ ** _changed **Rouge** 's username into  **LadyRose**_

 **Charlie:** My work here is done

 **Trashe:** Whoa! You came up with a bunch of meaningful names so quickly!

 **Pighead:** Yeah, you're quick!

 **LadyRose:** I guess you have sense in nicknaming after all.

 **HitOrMiss:** What is mine supposed to mean? I know it's some kind of internet meme or something

 **Bittersweet:** It's because of your obsession with rock paper scissors

 **Charlie:** Yeah. Lime gets me.

 **Claire#1supporter:** Don't you think my name is too long...?

 **Edgelord:** You don't need to type it out anyways

 **Claire#1supporter:** That is true, but still...

 **Bittersweet:** c'mon! Don't be so

 **Bittersweet:** sirius!

_**Lavender** ejected  **Bittersweet** out of the chat room._

**Trashe:** Why???? It's funny!

_**Lavender**  ejected **Trashe** out of the chat room._

**Lavender:** If you are going to make fun of my name, I'll not hesitate to kick you out of the chat

 **Charlie:** Well...

 **Charlie:** You can kick all you want, but are you aware that we can just add them back here?

 **LadyRose:** No, I want to enjoy some peace and quiet around here so leave them be

 **HitOrMiss:** But it's kinda boring, isn't it?

 **Pighead:** Yeah yeah! Zizel is right!

 **Lavender:** If you keep insisting I will not hesitate kicking you two out as well

 **HitOrMiss:** Oh well...I don't want to miss any funny drama so I'll stop

 **Pighead:** ; _ ;

 **LadyRose:** As I thought, you all are weird.


	3. Chapter 3

**Charlie:** Are we allowed to add back Trashe and Lime?

 **LadyRose:** Why would you even want to add back that hyperactive psycho when you yourself call him Trashe?

 **Charlie:** For entertainment purpose, obviously

 **Charlie:** I mean we all like to see Sirius bullying him

 **HitOrMiss:** Personally I don't mind one bit

**_Charlie_ ** _added **Trashe** and **Bittersweet** to the group chat_

**Pighead:** Guys I saw something

 **Pighead:** What is bdsm?

 **Claire#1supporter:** Where did you even hear that from????

 **LadyRose:**...What is that?

 **HitOrMiss:** Never heard of it

 **Bittersweet:** Dunno what it is but sounds interesting!

 **Trashe:** I know what is it!

 **Claire#1supporter:** DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE

 **Edgelord:** Whoa, that's a first

 **LadyRose:** I nominate kicking Bradley out of the chat for eternity although I don't know what that is

 **Pighead:** So...what is it???

 **Trashe:** I can tell you!!

_**Claire#1supporter** ejected  **Trashe** from the group chat._

**Charlie:**  Ah...I wish he can make the stay longer

 **Charlie:** Kinda disappointed

 **Pighead:** What is it?

 **Edgelord:** Bible Discussion and Study Meeting

 **Lavender:** Eh? So that's it? Why make a fuss out of something so normal?

 **Claire#1supporter:** Wilardo, you are not as bad as I thought

 **Edgelord:** Whatever

 **Charlie:** Is that it? Man, I got my expectations too high

 **HitOrMiss:** Judging from Noel's reaction I don't think that's the actual definition

 **HitOrMiss:** But well, Bible Discussion and Study Meeting is quite horrible

 **HitOtMiss:** At least for us

 **Pighead:** NOTHING BEATS MATHS THAT IS THE UTMOST HORRORIBLE THING IN THE ENTIRE EARTH HISTORY

 **LadyRose:** Eh? Maths?

 **Edgelord:** You're just bad at maths, that's all...

 **Pighead:** NO! MATHS LITERALLY MEANS MENTAL ABUSE TO HEALTH Y'ALL HAVE TO LISTEN TO ME

 **Lavender:** We lost Claire.

 **Charlie:** Ah, what a pity

 **Bittersweet:** FOR ONCE I AGREE WITH CLAIRE

 **LadyRose:** What?

 **Edgelord:**...Is that crack? Is it what you smoke? Do you smoke crack?

 **HitOrMiss:** Oh dear, we lost two...

 **Pighead:** NOBODY'S TAKING US SERIOUSLY LIME

 **Bittersweet:** YEAH!!! 

 **HitOrMiss:** Sometimes I can still hear their voices

 **Claire#1supporter:** No, actually I think you all became insane...

 **Edgelord:** Tell me about it


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like many of the ships (not that there's many to begin with) I tagged are non-existentent, but who cares amiritie
> 
> also I was writing this halfway before I became busy and forgot what I wanted to write so it took longer than expected

 

 **Charlie:** Alrighty guys

 **Charlie:** Who vote for adding Trashe back in here?

 **Claire#1supporter:** Only if he doesn't taint Claire's mind

 **Edgelord:** I wanna see him being decked so yeah

 **Bittersweet:** It means "I love him so pls add him back" in tsundere language

 **Edgelord:** Not so sure about that

 **Pighead:** Add him back! The more the merrier!

 **HitOrMiss:** As usual I am neutral

 **Charlie:** I take Sirius and Lady Rouge as "yes" if they remain silent then

 **Lavender:** I thought I've said for countless times that I despise Bradley

 **Lavender:** But did anybody notice?

 **Lavender:** No

 **Lavender:** Nobody ever listens to me

 **Bittersweet:** Don't be so salty you'd become a hater at this point

 **Bittersweet:** On second thought that isn't so bad

 **LadyRose:** No, that is bad

 **Claire#1supporter:** You better not drag Sirius into this mess or else I'll personally beat you up

 **Bittersweet:** Oh, you? Beating me up? Pfft nah Noel, you can't even hurt a fly

 **Edgelord:** Did Noel just snapped?

 **Charlie:** Are we gonna add Trashe back or not?

 **HitOrMiss:** I think no one really cares at this point if you add him back

 **Charlie:** okie

 **Pighead:** This is the first time I've seen Noel terrorizing others...

 **_Charlie_ ** _added **Trashe** into the chat room_

 **Trashe:** Whassup bros!

 **LadyRose:** Somebody kick him out again already

 **Claire#1supporter:** Oh fuck no Lime you've messed with me more than enough times already, although I want to avoid hurting others as much as possible, I won't really hesitate to literally roast you, cut you into pieces and put your pieces in acid

 **Trashe:** Oh wow did Noel just cursed? That's new!

 **HitOrMiss:** Sure is wild today

 **Lavender:** Is Noel okay?

 **Lavender:** Like, does he need a psychiarist or something? He seemed stress

 **Bittersweet:** OOH A SHIP IS SAILING

 **Claire#1supporter:** BITCH DON'T TRY TO CHANGE THE TOPIC

 **LadyRose:** Noel's cursed twice already, things ain't good

 **Edgelord:** Is nobody gonna talk about Sirius being kind? Really?

 **Pighead:** Sirius, that's sweet of you♡

 **Bittersweet:** Oh well Noel sweetie, are you sure you're even able to touch me? You're such a gentleman, you won't touch me, right?

 **Lavender:** WHAT'S THAT HEART FOR?!

 **Trashe:** Ooh Miss Claire just sent Sirius into straight panic!

 **Charlie:** Nah, more like bi panic bc we all know Sirius loves Noel as well

 **Lavender:** WHO SAID I LOVE NOEL?

 **Claire#1supporter:** Oh

 **Bittersweet:** Did I just get ignored?

 **Lavender:** Noel?

 **Edgelord:** This is surprisingly more interesting than I thought

 **HitOrMiss:** Oh, it seems like Wilardo does like drama. Charlie, you owe me 100 bucks.

 **Charlie:** Damn, I thought I'd win this

 **LadyRose:** You are betting on this...?

 **Claire#1supporter:** It's nothing

 **Trashe:** Ohh! Noel's hurt!

 **Pighead:** Ashe! That's not something to be happy about! 

 **Claire#1supporter:** Haha, thanks, Claire

 **Charlie:** Let's bet on Sirius x Noel, Sirius x Claire, Noel x Claire or poly this time

 **Charlie:** I bet on Noel x Claire

 **HitOrMiss:** Hmm, I go for Sirius x Noel

 **Lavender:** What are you talking about?

 **Trashe:** I can tell you!

_**Claire#1supporter** ejected  **Trashe** from the chat_

**HitOrMiss:**  Noel, don't tell me...you're homophobic?

 **Claire#1supporter:** I'm just scared that Ashe is going to talk about unnecessary things, that's all

 

 **Edgelord:** Can't say I don't understand what you mean...

 **LadyRose:** More importantly, you're betting again?

 **Bittersweet:** It's fun!

 **Bittersweet:** Can I bet for something else? Like...Noel and I?

 **Claire#1supporter:** NO WAY IN HELL

 **Bittersweet:** Technically we aren't in hell, so no worries!

 **LadyRose:** Why am I acquainted with you idiots again?


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things got chaotic so I stopped writing anything for quite a while, but I'm back so  
> Don't worry, I ain't sick, just not in the mood of doing anything entertaining

**Charlie:** Today's bet: whether Trashe would be kicked out of the chat room again

**HitOrMiss:** 50 chips for yes

**Bittersweet:** Ooh! That's a lot! But I'm gonna bet 100 chips for no!

**LadyRose:** Is betting really that fun?

**HitOrMiss:** Yes

**Pighead:** You don't sound like you're happy at all?

**Charlie:** It's called Resting Unemotional Tone

**Claire#1supporter:** What even is that fucking thing

**Lavender:** Guys i think we broke Noel

**Edgelord** **:** Are we even functional in the first place?

**Bittersweet:** LMAO WILARDO'S GOT A POINT

**Edgelord:** Someday or another I will kick you out

**Charlie:** Anyway I don't think anyone's gonna bet aside from Lime and Zizel so lemme kick start

**_Charlie_** _added **Trashe** into the chat room_

**Trashe:** Why am I ever the only one being kicked out???

**Edgelord:** Because you're annoying, don't know when to shut the hell up, and being an ass in general

**Pighead:** This is the most I've heard from Wilardo!

**Lavender:** I am surprised that you don't think of the trash badly  


**Pighead:** But he's nice!  


**Claire#1supporter:** He's nosy af  


**Bittersweet:** Noel swore again! Is he going to becoming an actual hater? I am so entertained by this development!!!  


_**Claire#1supporter** ejected  **Bittersweet** from the chat room_   


**LadyRose:** Finally, some peace and quiet

**LadyRose:** How come no one ever thought of the possibility of Lime being kicked?  


**HitOrMiss:** This is unexpected?  


**Charlie:** Totally unexpected, and yet I'm somehow not really surprised

**Edgelord:** I totally expected this  


**Trashe:** Wilardo! You expected this! You're kinda amazing!  


**Pighead:** I never knew you two were that close!  


**Lavender:** Do they sound close to you???  


**Charlie:** Agree, I mean, if you're to talk about close it's definitely Sirius and Noel  


**Claire#1supporter:** Would you please stop doing that?  


**HitOrMiss:** I smell something fishy  


**Pighead:** Did you eat too much fish?  


**LadyRose:** Pighead really suits you  


******Edgelord:** Is no one going to talk about how Noel immediately returned to his normal self after Lime's gone?  


**Trashe:** Grumpy Noel is fun! Let me add her back then!  


_**Lavender** ejected  **Trashe** from the chat room_   


**Charlie:** Disappointed but not surprised

**HitOrMiss:** I won:))  


**Author's Note:**

> Twitter: @NekomuraTsukiyo  
> Youtube: Nekomura Tsukiyo  
> Tumblr: @nekomura-tsukiyo  
> Wattpad: @NekomuraTsukiyo  
> Wtt backup account: @MoonNight912


End file.
